Clear As Mud: A World Geography Lesson

You don’t have to admit you didn’t know one or any of these facts, but just to clear things up:

1. Great Britain consists of three countries on one ISLAND (not Continent); Scotland (North), Wales (South/West) and England (South/East).

2. Britain and Great Britain are two separate things. The word “Britain” is derived from the original Roman province of Britannia during their “We’re going to take over the world!” phase.  Britannia/Britain is only England and Wales because Scotland wasn’t fully conquered. (GO BRAVEHEART!! or something.)

3. Now that we’ve established that Britain and Great Britain aren’t the same… I should also mention that GB/Britain aren’t the same as the United Kingdom (UK) either. Ugh.  Technicalities.

4. The United Kingdom consists of Scotland, Wales, England and Northern Ireland.  Ireland is a nearby island to the West of Wales, and was originally part of the U.K….however, with the exception of the Northern tip, most of Ireland decided they wanted to chill by themselves and become a Republic back in 1921.

5. The UK is technically part of Europe (the mainland) and the EU (European Union), but decided not to adopt the Euro currency and kept with the Pound Sterling.  Which, by the way the Euro is tanking these days, was probably a smart move.

6. The British Isles aren’t all part of the U.K., but GB is the largest of the islands.

7. The people of Wales are Welsh, not Welch. They’re not a grape soda. Nor do they have blow holes. Most speak English and many speak Welsh…which is a very complicated language, I might add.  Word to the wise: Don’t assume all British accents are ‘English’ and for the love god, don’t call a Welsh person English or my girlfriend WILL beat you up. She’d rather be called a sheep shagger.

8. Additionally, the people of Scotland are not Scotch. That’s a liquor.  And a brand of clear adhesive tape.  They’re Scots. Scotsmen. Scotswomen. Scottish.

END!

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